Open Question: Has anybody ever felt this way before?

Jul 16, 2012 // by SueBennett // Blog // No Comments

First Check Out These Featured Benefits of Meditation Solutions...

I’m 17…and a guy…
and like anybody would say…a normal guy would have his hormones bursting like a fire alarm…
well that’s what seems to interfere major parts of my life unlike for any body else i know…
I hate…HATE watching other people have sex (internet porn) …but well i’ve been doing just THAT involuntarily!!!…
Watching porn has effects on my mind….
i no longer can focus when i want to…
and cuz i do what i hate rather than what i’m supposed to…i feel very guilty…and this induces a major ‘All time low’ morale in me..
I feel like i have no (zero percent) control over my self or my emotions…
like maybe i’m a puppet…
i have masturbated like 5 times today…( i dont find pleasure in that) ..
i hate it and hate myself for doing so..
my power of will is now….variable…some times no one can shake my decisions but there are times like these which make me feel very hopeless and…..LOST…
i cant think straight….i cant talk normal to people…
i feel like i’m destroying myself…
all i want to know is a way to stay in control of my-self…and be able to do what is necessary..
cuz i find no happiness in what i did found before……..before this madness began..
PS: there’s nobody around here i can talk this out with…
and also Meditation,exercise nor did cold water baths have had any effects…
I’m help less…
and i seek help here…
Thank you very much to all those who have tried to help me out by sparing a moment of their life to attend to my prob…
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